Seriously so stressed!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

This picture has nothing to do with this post. I just liked it.

****WARNING SUPER LONG RAMBLING POST AHEAD****
Ok so it has been awhile since I last posted but I have been so stressed that I just couldn't think!! Ok so to make a SUPER LONG story short we are not getting the house we have been working on getting for a year now!!!! There are so many details that go back for a few months but in a lil nutshell the home builder is pulling out of this subdivision and sold out all the empty lots awhile back. So we quickly went to work on getting a spec home of the same model but 7 days before we were to close they pulled our last three months of bank deposits and because business has been slow and because our company is one of the types of fields that the economy has hit pretty hard it made us a risky canidate so they said we would need 20% down instead of the 10% we had. Are you kidding me there was no way we could come up with another 32K in 7 days!!! They just are not taking the gamble anymore like they use too of people getting into one house and dumping the other house they have so our Mesa house not selling didn't help in all of this either. So I was quite sad for a few days. I have been stressing about the whole thing for several weeks. This has made me learn somethings about myself. I found out that panic attacks are scary, that I throw up when I am so totally overwhelmed that my body just can't function or even think straight! I got the flu from the two little kids who each kicked it in one day only throwing up 3 times between the two of them. I on the other hand threw up for a straight 7 hours every half hour and couldn't kick the bug entirely for almost 4 days! Even with all this we know the Lord has another plan for us. He will take care of us as He always has. I am just having a very hard time with the waiting to see what his plan is and WHEN???? I am not a patient person. Let me give you the defination of patience:
pa·tient [ páysh'nt ]
adjective
Definition:
1. capable of waiting: able to endure waiting, delay, or provocation without becoming annoyed or upset
2. capable of persevering: able to persevere calmly, especially when faced with difficulties
Does this sound like me?? Uh......... no! Now I really don't want to hear that I need to learn to be patient(Rob) because if it has not happened yet then I am not gonna hold my breathe waiting!! I am the type that likes to know what I am getting for Christmas or my Birthday(hint-hint Rob). I have always been that way. Like the year my mom got me the Bionic Women Barbie doll for my birthday. It was in the top of the closet wrapped in a bag "secretly" waiting for my birthday. I climbed up there and peeked because I could not wait. I got caught!!! So that kinda sucked cuz I didn't get it for my birthday I had to wait 4 months till Christmas came. Did I learn anything then.... NOPE still no patience!

So we have been looking at other homes and we put 2 offers on homes and the first one the bank came back and said oh yeah we have that listed wrong the price is 15K more. So we said no thanks! The other was on the market for 4 days and we were the first offer and when they turned in all the offers we were out bidded. So we shall see.
So today we had a scary 15-20 minutes!! My little brother Cody came over for a lil while and he was teasing Kenna cuz she is scared of him and he is just a butt and thinks it is funny to tease her. So I had to leave and go to Costco. I get a call from Rob 15 minutes after I left asking if I took Kenna with me. I said no look for her and he is saying I am. So I turn around and head home. I call back 2 times and they are still looking for her. I am sick and crying. I get 5 minutes from home before he calls back that they had just found her! She had went in our room and locked the door and hid in the back corner by our tv unit and pulled a blanket on top of her. She was hiding from Uncle Cody!! After putting stuff away from Costco quite a bit later I go to the garage cuz I felt I should and yeah one of the freezers wasn't closed all the way!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! No this couldn't have happened before I went and restocked it!! This is just another day in the Milius household lately.